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Fwd: Re: Thiruvaaymozhi 9.6- Before I wanted to swallow Him, He drank me completely

From: Madhavakkannan V (
Date: Tue Sep 08 1998 - 16:59:52 PDT


Dearest Sri Murali,

Please forgive me for forwarding your private e-mail to me. It is so 
nice of you to think of this poor adiyEn, lowly self living in 
"sin"gapore missing all these great events in the west and in India. 
(like Sri MK Sudharshan, who keeps meeting Sri Ahobila Muth jeer and Sri 
Mukkur Lakshmi NarasimhAchariar)

It is great to hear that BhAgawathAs came and conquered the whole show. 
Oh No! I must have performed lots and lots of paapams for not being able 
to be there among Srivaishnavas.

I was delighted to hear about my dear friend Mani's skills on Prabandham 
recitation. It is not uncommon for the one who has started off this 
sathsangam and let it go on across the globe.  

Please throw more light on the event and make us feel the delight. 


Narayana dAsan Madhavakkannan

----Original Message Follows----
From: "muralidhar rangaswamy" <>
Subject: Re: Thiruvaaymozhi 9.6- Before I wanted to swallow Him, He 
drank me completely
Date: Tue, 08 Sep 1998 12:52:42 PDT

Dearest Sriman Kannan,

Thanks a lot for sharing with us another set of wonderful, nectarine 
Anubhavam. It is really like Navaneetam! By the grace of the Divine 
Couple, a grand celebration of the 600th anniversary took place. 
I thoroughly enjoyed the event. It gave me the opportunity to be part 
of a wonderful Bhagavata Satsangham. As always it was delightful to 
get together with old friends (Srimans Sadagopan, Anbil Swamin, 
Dileepan, Jaganath, Rengarajan, KalaLe, Sunder Kidambi, Sumanth Kaushik, 
Murali Kadambi, Venkat Kanumalla, Srinivas Tanikella, Ramesh 
Sarangapani, Vijayaraghavan Srinivasan, Anand Karalapakkam) and 
meet several wonderful people for the first time (Mohan Sagar, Mani, 
Varadhan, Govindarajan, Srini Kuthalam, Gopal Lakshmanan among others)
. The Prabandham recitation skills of Srimans Mani and Varadhan 
are extraordinary. Sri Vijayaraghavan delighted all with his mastery 
over Vedam and Desika Stotrams. The speeches were all very good. 
The best of them were the talks of Srimans Sadagopan and Venkat 
Kanumalla. Adiyen rendered the Nrusimha Gadyam, Mantrarajapada Stotram, 
and the Vishnu Ghanam (Eta Asadann Sukrutasya 
LokE tA VishNoh Pahi Pahi Yajnam Pahi Yajna Patim PahimAm Yajna Niyam). 

Namo Narayana,

Muralidhar Rangaswamy
>From Fri Sep  4 12:44:06 1998
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>From: "Madhavakkannan V" <>
>Subject: Thiruvaaymozhi 9.6- Before I wanted to swallow Him, He drank 
me completely
>Date: Fri, 04 Sep 1998 03:11:08 PDT
>Content-Type: text/plain
>Dearest Sisters and Brothers, (Don't miss the tenth pAsuram! Great 
>AzhwAr, was lamenting for being deserted by Emperumaan in the last ten. 
>Now, he remembers his previous enjoyment of being united with the Lord 
>(in his "irutthum viyandhum"- 8.7) and now he cherishes those memories 
>in this ten. Namjeeyer says "what AzhwAr enjoyed in 8.7, he brings out 
>for us here.". NampiLLai narrates that it is describing and enjoying 
>kalyANA guNAS of Emperumaan that removes the Viraha thaapam (and 
>inmai)- and that is how Alavanandhaar commented-
>(A great ten for BhAgawathAs to enjoy Ahobila Mutt 600 the centenary 
>celebrations better.)
>1. At Thirukaatkarai Divya Desam, SarvEshwaran is present so 
>Thinking of His excellent, ineffable KalyANa guNAs, my mind simply is 
>melting away. The desire (to enjoy Him more) burst out uncontrollably, 
>crossing all limits and bounds. I am not able to control the thirst 
>arises in me to enjoy His GuNAs, when I think of His GuNAs. What will I 
>do now, with so much craving for Him?
>2. My Father, who stays at Thirukkaatkarai! I keep thinking of Your 
>KalyANa guNAs. But I am not able to think of that fully and understand. 
>When they are so ineffable, I just wished to tell and enjoy and still I 
>am not able to do that. I have no capacity nor strength to utter that. 
>What can I do? Whether I think of them; or utter of them' they all 
>simply melt my heart and mind, like the watery food. If I sing of Your 
>Glories (that destroy all cruel sins), my jIvan itself burns. Hence, my 
>heart, mind, and jIvan- everything burns, and I am not able to think of 
>how to perform kaimkaryam to You, who is my master. 
>3. My father, whose colour is like that of dark, dense clouds, is 
>gracefully present at Thirukkaatkarai. I can not understand the way He 
>deceived me and cheated, by entering into my mind. Then after doing all 
>this, He is now making me involve in His kalyANa guNAs, and making me 
>get melted thinking of His guNAs. The Saviour, The Protector, who 
>have taken care of me, is now, on the contrary, killing me! He is 
>my mind (with His guNAs). Is it not deceit? He entered in to me o 
>ensalve me and shows all His qualities. I am not able to comprehend 
>them. (Such SarvEshwaran, due to His Parama sowlabhyam, has stopped 
>so low to my level and entered into me and showed me His GuNAs- I just 
>can NOT describe His such a GuNA- He is so GREAT!)
>4. All worlds come into His mind for controlling them. He directs and 
>executes, unmistakably, as an antharyaami in all beings. Such a Lord is 
>here at Thirukkaatkarai. Such a Parathvam, antharyaami, who is there in 
>anthing and everything, is so much in love with this lowly small 
>craeture, (i.e me). And How can I know of His such Greatest GuNA? An 
>aRpan (lowly self), - adiyEn- and He has swallowed adiyEn's AthmA and 
>showed me His Graceful GuNAs. Such GuNA of His- The One who destroyed 
>(my ego) and swallowed me completely and shows me Himself and His 
>How can I get to understand that?
>5. Emperumaan, as if He is going to bless me with His grace and dayA, 
>entered into my heart and occupied it entirely. Thereafter, He, in one 
>gulp, swallowed both my body and the jIvan simultaneously (with His 
>Beauty and KalyANa guNAs- means: My jIvan now only wants Him and my 
>senses, His ThirumEni.) Such a mischievous Lord is here gracefully 
>showing Himself at Thirukkaatkarai. What a way that Dark Black Beauty 
>cheated me! Not only did He stoop down so low (with such a sowlabhyam) 
>to enslave me, He also enjoys my Body and AthmA all by Himself (by 
>swallowing them with His GuNAs and Beauty) How loving is He towards me 
>6. That KaNNan's cheating acts of appearing as if He obliges  (and 
>entering into me and eating the whole of me) appear to be true to me. 
>That only shows and proves His love for me and His swallowing of my 
>AthmA and my Body due to His great love for me only substaniate my 
>understanding. Even then, with this little knowledge, I keep paraisng 
>Him saying "Emperumaan KaNNan, My Lord, is here at Thirukkaatkarai". 
>(One Tamil scholar interprets the line "enakku semmaay irukkum" as " 
>enakku sEmamaay irukkum" means: He is comfort and well being for me; 
>(and not as indicated in the first line of this paragraph.- It is also 
>7. Bhagawaan, under the pretext of enslaving me, enters into me and ate 
>(swallowed) my uyir (jIvan). A little portion of my "uyir", which was 
>consumed by such Maayavan- Cheater- KaNNan, is still let over by Him 
>is yet to be swallowed. Due to that little- which is yet to be 
>swallowed- I am praising Thirukkaatkarai Emperumaan and pray to Him 
>(Look at the beauty of the words- AzhwAr is enjoying terrific, Dearest 
>BhagavatOttamAs. He had eaten my life. But didn't finish everything and 
>left a little bit yet to be swallowed by His Beauty and GuNAs. Hence, I 
>have still some "kuRai". (means it is not whole- some thing still 
>remains). Such a "kuRaiyuLLa" adiyEn- the One who has still that kuRai" 
>is praying to Emperumaan for finishing that kuRai also and making him 
>wholly swallowed). Hence, I keep calling Him "KaNNA! KaNNA!". Due to my 
>longing for Him (to finish His quota), I suffer- I torment and melt 
>thinking of Him continuously.
>8. Bhagawaan, without expecting anything from me and any effort from my 
>end, swallowed my AthmA and enjoyed me. Everyday, He came, He entered 
>into me, ate me and enjoyed. He is the Emperumaan who is here at 
>Thirukkaatkarai and is my Emperumaan. My jIvan has become the obedient 
>servant of Emperumaan, who is like the Dark Black Clouds which had 
>swallowed the water (rainy clouds). Hence, I am really suffering due to 
>His GuNAs. ( The suffering due to Bhagawaan's GuNAs is so  great and 
>natural and His swallowing me is like the clouds swallowing the 
>9. Due to my love and thirst for Him and my suffering from that- who 
>else would have suffered like me? (None would have- That is why AzhwAr 
>is kula pathi). Would NityasUris also have suffered  like me? 
>(Naturally! It is His Beauty and KalyANa guNAs that do the trick! They 
>must have suffered!) That Black Beauty has large petalled Lotus flower 
>like eyes. He has red, curvy, most beautiful bimbhA fruit 
>("Kovvaippazham") like lips and mouth. He is here at this divya sthalam 
>of Thirukkaatkarai. He has got the movely name of "Deiva vaari" and to 
>Such Perumaan- in as much as my jIvan suffers, no one else would have 
>suffered. (Deiva vaari is the name of Emperumaan in this Divya Desam. 
>Means: the God of all (demi) Gods- hence, Deiva vaari - The Deivam 
>who creates Demi Gods.)
>10. (Dearest Sisters and Brothers- This is a damn good pAsuram. What an 
>enjoy ment of AzhwAr! How would have sung and How Madhurakavi must have 
>enjoyed! Don't we envy Madhura kavi?) "vaarik koNdu unnai 
>kaaNil enRu/ aarvuRRa ennai ozhiya ennil munnam/ paaritthu* thaan ennai 
>muRRap paruginaan/ kaarokkum kaatkarai appan kadiyanE/". BhagawaanE! 
>moment I saw You, immedialetly I longed and desired to take You in both 
>arms and eat You. (We used to say that to our kids when they are small. 
>"unnai appadiyE kadicchu saappidalaam pOla irukku." I feel like biting 
>your cheeks and eating you. That is out of our love and affection. 
>AzhwAr gets into that extent of love or even much more. Will we ever 
>an iota of such love for Emperumaan?). But, You, are ahead of me and 
>before I acted, You have taken me and drunk me completely. Such 
>Lord is Thirukkatkarai Emperumaan. The love which I have for Him 
>(because of which I felt like eating Him) is luch less than what He has 
>for me (as He has drunk me before I even went nearer to Him). 
>(NampiLLai, for this word "paruginaan" (drunk) comments so beautifully 
>and nicely; Last pAsurams, AzhwAr said that Emperumaan ate Him and 
>swallowed Him. Now after eating He needed water to drink. Hence, He 
>drank AzhwAr. Because AzhwAr is His "uNNum chORu and parugum neer". 
>Isn't he? First, Emperumaan, (as told by AzhwAr in the first pAsuram) 
>made AzhwAr melt like watery food due to Hia Beauty and guNAs; and then 
>in the last pAsuram, He has drunk him. What a commentary by NampiLLai!)
>11. Bhagawaan, when He appeared as KaNNan, killed kamsan. About such 
>Emperumaan KaNNan- Sri SadagOpar of Thirukkurugoor has sung 1000 
>pAsurams. Out of them, these ten will enable it readers to finish the 
>vicious cycle of births and deaths and destroy this "mirage" water of 
>samsaaram (illusory happiness)
>NammAzhwAr ThiruvadigaLE SaraNam
>Ram Ram
>With Best Regards
>NarayaNa dAsan madhavakkannan
>P.S Wishing the 600 the centenery celebration of Sri Ahobila Muth a 
>grand success! my mind will only be there. Can Dileepan please post the 
>photos in Sri Ahobila Muth web page, not only Emperumaan's also of 
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