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Thiruvaaimozhi 5.10- AzhwAr's anubhavam- Anandham, Anandham AnandhamE!

From: Madhavakkannan V (srivaishnavan_at_hotmail.com)
Date: Wed May 06 1998 - 06:25:09 PDT

SrI:

Dearest Sisters and Brothers,

AzhwAr, in the last ten pAsurams, desired to enjoy the sowndharyam of 
Thiruvallavaazh Emperumaan. He emphasized that it is His grace and mercy 
that enables us to even talk about His kalyANa guNAs. AzhwAr now 
concentrates more on His avathaars than on His archai forms and tries 
his luck to enjoy Him. Especially AzhwAr immerses himself in 
KrishNAvataar. (parathvam and sowlabhyam of Emperumaan is present 
abundantly in KrishNAvataar). AzhwAr, keeps thinking of Emperumaan's 
KalyANa guNAs and exerts himself in his appreciation and enjoyment of 
the same. AzhwAr, being unable to bear the exertion, prostrates on the 
ground and begs Emperumaan for His mercy to grant him strength to enjoy 
Him and His guNAs ceaselessly. What an anubhavam! 

NampiLLai narrates three subtly different interpretations about this 
aspect in this set of ten pAsurams.

KooratthAzhwAn's anubhavam: Since AzhwAr lost himself while admiring the 
great acts of KrishNAvataar, surrenders to Him and begs for His mercy to 
grant him more strength to sing in praise of Him.

EmbAr's anubhavam: AzhwAr, while longing for Emperumaan, pleads 
"BhagawaanE! Your GunAs are kept lingering in my mind and are killing 
me; I am suffering terribly due to that. Please make me get rid of all 
these sufferings and make me reach Your Lotus Feet and be with You 
always and enjoy You endlessly".

ThirukkurugaippiLLaan's anubhavam: SarvEshwaran is born at AyarpAdi- 
AzhwAr heard of that and immediately desired to reach Him and attempted 
to see Him. But he hears that Emperumaan has come and reached SrI 
Vaikuntam, as a jyOthiswarUpI. AzhwAr prostrates on the ground 
immediately longing to see Him and begs for His grace.

The verses are so good and are great outpourings that they have made 
these four Parama bhAgawathALs interpret in such most beautiful 
inferences. Let us have a look at their rich meanings:

1. EmperumaanE! (Without getting bounded by KarmAs, just to join the 
bhakthAs and devotees, for making Your Divya ThirumEni, (which gets 
NEVER entangled with prakritti) commonly and easily accessible to all 
bhakthAs and a source of tremendous enjoyment for all devotees) You were 
born here in this place. When I think of that sowlabhya guNA of yours, 
the ParamAtmA, to appear amongst us, the lowly selves, my heart melts, 
Lord! Is Your birth alone a wonder and marvel (for having released Your 
parents devaki and VasudEvar instantaneously)? the way You grew up, was 
yet another marvel. (bhUthanai's life itself was sucked by You; You grew 
up and were taken care affectionately by YasOdhA; How nicely You were 
brought up!) Then You made the KurukshEthra battle get called The 
MahAbhAratha Yudhham" and took so many strategies and wonders for Pancha 
PaaNdavaas to win; (You said You will not take the weapon; But it is not 
essential for You to use weapon for winning; even your smile is enough!) 
After completing the purpose of Your avattars, You have disappeared to 
SrIvaikuntam. When I think of all such wonderful events and Your 
marvelous acts, they all refuse to leave my mind and are torturing me to 
see You; I am greatly moved by such acts of Yours; Oh Most beautiful, 
Illustrious Lord! When will I join You? 

2. When You heard that only the One who tames the seven oxen and kills 
them will be able to marry Nappinnai, You immediately fought and killed 
the seven oxen to establish Your valor. The asurA, who came in disguise 
as a horse (kEsi)- was killed by You. Oh KaNNA! Maayavaa! You danced 
with those beautiful gOpis; one can not categorize Your acts as this 
type, that type, or neutral, etc., and add value to them- (they are 
beyond analyzing). Oh Lord! The One who protected the Old Universe 
during PraLayam! When will I be able to join You? (Means: You protected 
the one that is old; the universe; but now, I am alive, struggling, 
suffering, lamenting; yet, why don't You protect me? - as interpreted by 
Periyavaacchaan PiLLai)    

3. KaNNA! Your wonderful, valorous acts stupefy me and are killing me; 
bhUthnai came and acted as if she is so fond of You and breast fed You 
with her poisonous milk to kill You; but You are simply GREAT. You 
sucked the poisonous milk along with her life even! What a wonderful 
infant, kutti KaNNA! You destroyed the One who came as a wheel of a cart 
to run over You! You established Your bAla paraakramam by kicking that 
wheel with Your small, rosy, lovely, cute, Red Lotus like Paadham 
(foot)! The moment yasOdhA heard that You stole the butter and ate form 
others' houses, she scolded You (the small lovely boy) with angry fear 
some eyes and with a sharp stick in her hands and You looked at her with 
tears rolling down the tender soft cheeks from Your beautiful eyes, and 
pleaded innocence- this scene even today is melting my heart, KaNNA! (It 
is melting us, too. Isn't it? Sisters and brothers, Aha!  what a poet 
and what an enjoyment! The same feeling and enjoyment one gets when we 
listen to Sri KrishNa prEmi's upanyaasam- SUPERB and full of Kannan 
anubhavams;)

4. (In the last pAsuram, AzhwAr narrated about the mischiefs He did in 
His bhakthAls' homes- here in this pAsuram, how He did mischief in the 
enemies' group, too). EmperumaanE! You are a Great Lord! You deceived 
people by telling some interpretation against vEdAs and took the vEsham 
of BhuddhA to mislead people who are of nature of asurAs by giving wrong 
religious upadEsams from BuddhA. You made them go against Vaidheeka 
shraddhai. When I think of such marvelous mischievous acts of Yours, I 
can NOT understand them; this makes me suffer even more with Your 
wonderful acts; not just that. You have even granted a portion of Your 
body to Sivan also, who was created by You. These acts are really 
melting my heart and my AthmA. (NampiLLAi and Periyavaacchaan PiLLai 
also mentioned this bhuddhA tatvam)

5. KaNNa PerumAnE! When Aayar kulam was worshipping IndrA and offered 
food to him, You, as a boy, started eating before the food was offered 
to IndrA; You protected all of them including the cattle by lifting 
GOvardhan Giri with Your little finger when it rained cats and dogs (as 
per the command of angry IndrA). You kept the entire universe in Your 
stomach during Cosmic cycle ending and spat them after. Are Your wonders 
just that? No. You took TrivikramAvataar and measured the entire world 
in one step. You brought the same earth back during Varaaha avataar. 
When I think of all such marvelous acts, my heart has been melting like 
the burning wax.

6. Oh BhagawaanE! The One who saved the world during PraLayam! I can NOT 
think and understand Your greatness; You stand, sit, lie down- Your 
postures are never fully understandable; Your acts are so wonderful and 
marvelous. Even though I melt thinking of these excellent marvels of 
Your mischief, I still am NOT able to completely capture You. The 
Greatest sinner, I am. How can I dare expect to see You and understand 
You? Please bless me and show me Your mercy on me to get to know You. 

("ninRavaaRum irundhavaaRum kidanthavaaRum"- the first line of this 
pAsuram means: the standing, sitting and lying down posture at 
Thiruvooragham, Thiruppaadagham and Thiruve:gaa respectively, as per 
panneeraayiraappadi. 

NampiLLai says: ninRavaaRum- SrI Rama stands victoriously at lankA 
entrance; iRundhavaaRum- SrI Rama sits most gracefully at Chithrakootam 
along with His consort SItA; kidanthavaaRum-at ParNasaalai SrI Rama is 
lying down and relaxing)

There are also interpretaions from KrishNAvataar: 1. Govardhan Giri- 
ninRavaaRum; 2. With aaycchi Gopis, sitting with the- iRundhavaaRum; 3. 
lying down on the lap of Gopis- KidanthavaaRum. 

When ThiruvarangapperumAL araiyar was singing this pAsuram, this line, 
Sri Ramanujar was having his eyes closed and enjoying and uttered " all 
happened at the craddle where kutti KaNNan was sleeping;- He tries to 
get up to catch the bell that is tied at the top of the 
craddle-ninRavaaRum; but, He loses balance and sits on it- 
irundhavaaRum; getting tired and exhausted, He lies down there itself- 
KidanthavaaRum- WHAT A GREAT ANUBHAVAM OF YATIRAAJAA!

In fact, Thirumazhisai has sung a pAsuram also on the same words 
enjoying these three- "ninRathu enthan ooraghatthu, iRundhathu enthan 
paadagatthu.....anRu naan piRanthilEn piRanthapin maRanthilEn ninRathum 
iRundhathum kidandhathum en nenjuLE- I was not born when He stood at 
Thiruooragham; when He sat at Thiruppaadagham and when He lied down at 
Thiruva:ghaa but after I was born, I simply can not forget. He stood, 
sat and lied down - where? in my heart only-ThirumazhisaiAzhwAr enjoys 
thus)

7.My KaNNA, The One who is like The Black Emerald! In my inner eye, in 
my mind, You are showing Yourself so majestically, so brightly as a 
jOthiswarUpi. But You are not seen outside and there is so much darkness 
outside. (Also, for devotees, You are showering so much mercy and saving 
them always and hence, are seen so conspicuously and so brightly by 
them, while for the non-believers, You are NOT seen and You keep them in 
the dark.) But I AM NOT ABLE TO SEE YOU WITH MY PHYSICAL EYES. You are 
doing EVERYTHING behind the stage. For my mind You have done so much to 
enable NOT to forget me at anytime. There is no boundary or limit for 
what You have done to me. I am SIMPLY MOVED thinking of all these Great 
wonderful acts of Yours and Your mercy on me. (Even when my mind has 
enjoyed You so much, my eyes are NOT able to see!) At least someday (one 
day) Please bless me to enable me see and enjoy Your Lotus Feet 
COMPLETELY.

8. EmperumaanE! I am getting moved tremendously listening to Your guNAs 
and wonderful acts. I am contemplating on Your lovely Beautiful Yoga 
nithrA in Your Graceful lying posture during the PraLayam. You are the 
antharyaamin of BrahmA, who appeared on the Lotus from Your Navel. 
Having him as the sarIram (body), You are the One who is creating 
everything. When I think of such Primordial nature and unmatched, 
peerless, Parathvam of Yours and when I think of Your Glorious acts, my 
heart simply melts longing for You, and admiring Your Lordship and my 
eyes are welled with tears, that roll down the cheeks ceaselessly. What 
will "adiyEn" do?

9. BhagawaanE! You went to mahAbhali and begged for three measures of 
land, and immediately appeared as Trivikraman. The deep seas, the entire 
earth, the dEva lOkam, etc., etc., - all You measured in Your two steps 
with Your Feet and for the third, stepped on mahAbhali's head and 
imprisoned him. What a marvel! What a wonder! What a Glorious act! 
Hearing such acts, narrating such marvels my heart immerses itself in 
those things and simply melts, Lord! I, The Greatest sinner- when will I 
join You? (They all say that "naama sankheerthan" removes even Great 
sins, - but uttering His names and guNAs are troubling me heavily and 
are melting my heart, to the contrary!)

10. EmperummanE! Look at the way You churned the ThiruppaaRkadal (Milk 
Ocean). You were unbiased and joined dEvAs and asurAs and helped them; 
but ultimately You made only dEvAs eat the nectar (amirtham). You 
appeared as The Most Beautiful mOhinI and cheated the asurAs to forget 
the amirtham. I am greatly moved by such excellent glories of Yours, 
EmperumaanE! Your such marvelous acts enter into my mind, my heart, my 
jIvan (uyir) and are only eating me terribly. How will I know to get rid 
if it? Oh NathanE! The One who lies down on AdhisEshA! Please bless me 
the way to reach Your Lotus Feet.

11. Thirukkurugoor SrI SadagOpar has surrendered at the Lotus Feet of 
Emperumaan (who lied down on AdhisEshA), and with that only thinking in 
his mind, and sang 1000 pAsurams with great bhakti for Emperumaan. Out 
of those 1000, readers of these ten are sure to reach the eternal SrI 
Vaikuntam.

AzhwAr ThiruvadigaLE saraNam                              

Ram Ram

With Best Regards

NarayaNa dAsan madhavakkannan


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