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Coping with Conflicting Thoughts

From: Sheela Belur (sbelur_at_CapAccess.org)
Date: Thu Jul 08 1999 - 07:14:44 PDT

Dear Athma bhandus,

I am looking for advice from learned members of this group in my 
time of need - on how to  cope with conflicting thoughts following the loss 
of a dearest one who has lived a  full life with utmost belief in 
Shrivaishanvam and attained perumal  thiruvadi  by the grace of 
Udeyawar's  sambhandham . Inspite of the firm  belief that the departed  
soul is liberated  from the misery of births and has reached its desired 
abode in Parama padam, the heart feels heavy and the separation seems 
unbearable. Being a   Shrivaishnava by birth and by humble attempted 
actions, can not help thinking that the cause for this is selfishness.
 Afterall, the "swathu" has attained  its "Swami" (or the otherway!)and 
this is the time to only rejoice and not grieve. The mind  knows this 
and feels guilty for  having any sorrowful thoughts. Although we have all 
heard from discourses  throughout our lives as to how to cope  with these 
conflicting thoughts,  I would be grateful if I can get some help (sort 
of refresher course) in  my time of need. I welcome either personal email 
or posting on the list.

Adiyen,

Sriranganayaki - Ramanuja Dasi