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Thiruvaaymozhi 7.9- What, How can I repay Him for His Krupai?

From: Madhavakkannan V (srivaishnavan_at_hotmail.com)
Date: Thu Jul 09 1998 - 01:56:41 PDT

SrI:

Dearest Sisters and Brothers,

NammAzhwAr gets into his grateful mood and is so grateful to Emperumaan 
for His grace on him to let him compose these verses. AzhwAr says in 
these ten pAsurams that there is no way that he can repay Emperumaan for 
what good He has done to him. Needless to say that it is a great ten 
again!

1. Emperumaan has saved me for all my eternal future (as long as time 
can prevail and exist), considering even me as an object worthy to be 
considered. From the time He has enslaved me as His humble servant for 
ever, He has blessed me with everything (jnAnam, bhakti ) and utilised 
me as an instrument to sing about Himself in Sweet tamil verses. Such 
Great SarvEshwaran- Primordial Chief- SarvakaaraNan- Most Brightest 
Master of mine- How will I praise Him? 
 
2. That maayavan- the Mischievous Lord- Emperumaan- has sung about 
Himself in His own words, but only used me as an instrument to compose 
these verses. He gave everyone an impression that it is "I" who sings in 
my words in praise of Him and made me compose His words through me. 
Thus, my precious life has been made by Him an object of worthiness. 
Such  Marvellous Lord - Wonder- The Chief of the trio (mummUrthys)- has 
made me fit enough to be considered by Him. What will I say in gratitude 
for what He has done to me? How will I stand? What all will I speak 
about Him?
 
3. My dearest Father- Emperumaan- has enabled me to have a clear concept 
about Him and realise that "He is the Chief of all!" (Aam mudhalvan 
Ivan!); He has gracefully entered into my tongue and sat down there to 
make it appear that I sing the sweetest Tamil pAsurams in praise of Him. 
(thus He sang about Himself, using me as His instrument!). Such a 
Merciful Lord of mine- is the reason for these pAsurams- How can I 
forget Him ever? (If I forget Him, I am an ungrateful wretch) (In 
Kancheepuram, when Alanvandhaar was present (in the eastern side at 
ThiruppuRRu), He was shown Sri ramanuja from afar, who had happened to 
come over there (with his then guru Yadavaaprakasar). Alavandhaar, 
seeing the Divya tEjas of YathirAjA, said "Aam mudhalvan Ivan!" as 
referred in this pAsuram.)
 
4. Bhagawaan considered as a worthy object (who is actually NOT), and 
utilised me as His instrument and sang faultless beautiful pAsurams 
about Himself. The Greatest incorrigible sinner- I am- He has even saved 
me! Not just that! He has used ME (out of all good people in this world) 
to sing about Him and hid my incapacity and uselessness. After knowing 
His such a GuNA, How can I ever forget Him?
 
5. Emperumaan (alone) knows His kalyANa guNAs completely. I- the lowly, 
illiterate, ajjnAnI, having absolutely NO CAPACITY, a useless person; 
have been considered as an object of worthiness and have been blessed 
and used by Emperumaan to sing about Him. He made me His bhakthA and 
enabled me to sing Bhakti-laden songs on Him. That Chief- who has no 
parallel to Him- made me sing such sweet verses on His Glories.
 
6. There are umpteen much better poets than me in this world. Even then, 
without making use of their talents and strengths to sing about Himself, 
He - My Vaikunta Nathan- has made ME sing about Him. Today, He has come 
and is with me and has made me sing on Him. With rhythmic words and rich 
meanings He has made me sing such verses. 
 
7. Emperumaan- Sri Vaikunta Nathan- is so merciful to remove and destroy 
all my numerous countless sins and has blessed me. His Parama krupai has 
made me realise that I am His possession. He has even made me sing on 
Him and praise Him as "Sri Vaikunta Nathan". On such Sri Vaikunthan- 
even if I sing all days melting with Bhakti- will I still be satisfied? 
(No.)
 
8. My Lord- Sriman Narayanan has got the Divine ChakrA in His Beautiful 
hand. That Em piraan has made me - who has absolutely no capacity to be 
a poet nor a bhakthA nor any desire to become one- His property for 
ever. Is it just that? He has even made me sing about His guNAs and 
Glories in sweet verses (which I am NOT at all capable of). Have I 
become an object for His Greatest guNA? Even though I sing as if I have 
fully experienced Him, Does that mean I have? (No. It is He who is doing 
it.). Even if one gets all powers of the vast space, the mammoth waters, 
and sing enjoying Him for infinite amount of time, it is still 
insatiable; Such an aaraavamudhan avan.
 
9. Bhagawaan- with His limitless krupai (dayA), has made me- (who was 
totally away from Him and was NOT at all proceeding towards His 
direction) His property and used me to sing many verses on Him. He is 
capable of making even a lowly grass do great wonders! Such a Wonderful 
maayavan- My Lord- Even if I enjoy Him and His guNAS all days (taking 
all my past days and future days into account), I will still be longing 
for more.
 
10. For His mercy and Great upakaaram towards me and making me sing such 
verses on Him, I would love to do something to repay to Him. Even if I 
plan to give my life and jIvan to repay Him for His dayA, that also 
belongs to Him only and  IS NOT mine. What else to do? For such merciful 
Lord, the One who made me sing about Him, there is NOTHING in both 
worlds that I can offer to Him; (because everything is His). There is 
absolutely Nothing that I can do.
 
11. The Lord- Thirumaal Emperumaan- but for Him- there is Nothing 
anywhere realises Sri SadagOpar and sings 1000 verses in praise of Him. 
Out of them, reciters / readers of these TEN, in whichever fashion, 
(enghanamE sollinum inbham payakkumE- means even if it is translated by 
worthless incorrigible sinner like Madhavakkannan), it will fetch tem 
Greatest Blissful Happiness. 

(Referring to Sri Krishnamaachari's excellent post on Swami Desikan's 
Nyasadaskam verse 3, it matches perfectly with NammAzhwAr's feelings and 
anubhavam. Quote: One who is doing prapatti should realise that bhagavAn 
is our Lord, and whatever knowledge we have, whatever we do, whatever 
effects they have, whatever benefits they result in, these are all His 
acts, and everything
belongs to Him.  This is called sAttvika tyAgam.  This is a necessary 
and essential concept of any dharma towards the attainment of moksham.  
This consists of three parts - 1.  We should realise that bhagavAn uses 
us as the means to do things, and it is not we who perform any act by
ourselves.   This is called kartr*ttva tyAgam.  2. We should realise 
that the benefits accruing from our acts are not the result of our acts, 
but that of bhagavAn.  This is called mamatA tyAgam.  3.  We should 
dedicate the benefits of any of our actions also to bhagavAn, and not 
look at the
benefits as belonging to us.  This is called phala tyAgam. Unquote. My 
heartiest thanks to Sri Krishnamachari for his such Great kaimkaryams).

NammAzhwAr ThiruvadigaLE SaraNam


Ram Ram

With Best Regards

NarayaNa dAsan madhavakkannan


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