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naanEthaan aayiduga- Some reflection of Athma guNAs

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Madhavakkannan V • August 1, 2000 


Sri:
Srimathe Ramanujaya Namah:

Dearest sisters and Brothers,

On this great day of Sri GodhA PiraaTTi's (Sri AndAL) Thirunakshathram, let 
us pay our obeisance to the Lotus Feet of Sri AndaL by dwelling on Her word 
"naanEthaan ayiduga" (in 15th pAsuram of Thiruppaavai) (meaning: may be -I 
am at fault). NaanE than aayiduga means: Let naan (“I”) be what “I” should 
actually be- i.e. being eternal servant- daasan of Emperumaan. (naan ) 
naanEthan aayiduga.

Please forgive me for my free translations (though not error free). This
article elaborated mainly on "naanEthaan ayiduga" is based on one of the 
pamphlets that are released regularly under "Project Popularization of Swamy 
Desika's works" by Sri U Ve. C Seshadri of Chennai. This particular one was 
released on the 80th Thirunakshathram of asmadhacharyan Srimad 
PaRavaakkOttai Andavan Sri Gopaladesika Mahadesikan (8.4.2000).  This is 
from Srimad Rahasyathrayasaram of Swamy Desikan - SwanishTa abhignaana 
adhikaaram. (Chapter-14).

(This is ONLY intended to remind ourselves of these Athma guNAs that we need 
to inculcate and cultivate- for us, Srivaishnavas, who have surrendered to 
the Lotus Feet of Sriya: Pathi Sriman Narayanan. This is srivaishnava 
lakshaNam to DEVELOP cultivating these guNAs. I always relish referring to 
Sri KooratthAzhwAn's glory again and again on his GREATEST ATHMA guNAs.

This post is more of my loud thinking to rectify myself.. Or at least
attempt.- start attempting. It is NOT an overnight phenomenon. It requires 
us to have the "real" feeling of "jIvan's" true nature of belonging to 
Sriya: Pathi as His sEshan- His vasthu, His possession- His eternal servant

Swarupa nishtai:

1. If we happen to listen to the statements (derogatory) about us, like "He 
is short; He is dark; He is of ugly face; He is lame; He is stupid- not 
intelligent; He is of low caste" and any other abusive statements, do not 
worry. These statements are all for our body (sarIram) and nothing of that 
sort relates to our AthmA, which is permanent, pure always. Hence, we do not 
need to scold back or howl at them for such statement; nor we need to sulk 
and feel remorseful.

2. Further, if someone really scolds or abuses us with such statements as 
above, or any other disparaging remarks against us, feel sorry for him that 
he unnecessarily incurs paapams (sins) by such statements and pray to 
Emperumaan to have krupai on him (remember Sri KooratthAzhwAn forgiving 
Nalooraan).

3. Sometime, we may not adhere to saaasthras (I always fall in this 
category) and due to laziness, or exertion, may skip some deed; if someone 
finds us with that defect and corrects us, we should not get angry for being 
caught red handed; instead, we need to feel thankful and be grateful to him 
for correcting us at the most appropriate time. (Once ThirukkOshithoyoor 
Swamy due to feeling tired, leaned on a pillar in Srirangam temple during 
VaikuNTa EkAdashi festival, another person (like me, waiting to find someone 
at fault), approached Swamy and pointed that Swamy should not do that being 
an AchArya. (One is not supposed to lean on and relax in Bhagawath 
Sannidhi). Immediately Swamy apologized and thanked him for correcting him. 
He felt indebted to him for preventing him do that apacharam which he had 
committed without even realizing that he was doing.) What a quality! -I 
would have said "sardhaan pOm Swamin.. Unga vElayai paathuNdu pOvIngaLaa?")

4. Even when one finds us committing apacharams and tells us, we need to 
consider as if Emperumaan is speaking to us through him to correct us and 
consider it a Divine will. We should not think of any ill against such 
people. Even when it is false accusations, we should think that Emperumaan 
is only testing us for balanced mind to face insults.

5. When one accuses without proper analysis, and without any reason, only 
based on prejudices, we should feel delighted that our praarabhdha karma is 
getting dissolved by through his such false accusations and be thankful to 
Emperumaan for enabling us get dissolved of our praarabdha karma so easily.

UpAya nishtai:

1. Except for SarvEshawaran, Sriya: Pathi Sriman Narayanan, we and our 
family (wife, children) are not servants or daasa bhUthars to anyone else.

2. Even when we are in the evening of our life, or suffering from deadly 
disease, and are going to die, since we have already surrendered to 
Emperumaan, we should feel happy that the time has come to unite with Him at 
SrivaikuNtam through archiraadhi maargam. (soozhuvisum panimugil thhoriyam 
muzhakkina.- TVM 10.9) and gladly welcome death with smiling face. We should 
know fully well that we are going to be sitting on the soft lap of our 
Father Sri Parama padha nAthan looking and enjoying His red coral like lips 
and be along with His samastha parivaaram.- Nithyars and mukhthars.

3. Having surrendered to the Sriya: Pathi, we should not worry about our 
protection and not be scared of any event happening. He is there to protect 
us and whatever happens is His Divine will. (It need not be what we desire. 
It will be what He desires for us.)

4. Having surrendered to the Sriya: Pathi, we should not undertake any other 
means (like bhakti yOgam). We have surrendered to Him with an unflinching 
faith (mahAviswaasam). He has already taken a pledge to save us from all 
sins and has assured us Not to worry. (so why worry?) We should not do some 
yaagams /homams or any other karmas simply because it is going to give us 
some puNyam, but simply as Bhagawath preethyartham.

5. Having surrendered to the Sriya: Pathi, We should always think that it is 
all in Emperumaan's will to alleviate our sorrows and to grant us something 
good until our death. Whatever happens is for good.

Purushaartha nishtai:

1. Having surrendered to the Sriya: Pathi, we should NEVER ever seek for 
material comforts, nor should we unduly be worried about some problems 
occurring at home with our family, - with a thinking that everything is 
happening only due to praarabhdha karma.

2. By worrying about anything, nothing gets resolved. It has to happen as 
per Bhagawath sankalpam. - With that jnAnam, we should not brood about the 
domestic problems occurring.

3. If there is some unexpected wealth or comfort comes our way also (of 
course through dharmic way), we should not shun them. We should consider 
them as Bhagawath sankalpam and think that that is way to get rid of 
(praarabdha karma phalam) puNyams as they will also be stumbling block for 
SrivaikuNTa prApthi.

4.  We should view both happiness and sorrows equally with a balanced mind 
and have ruchi (taste) only for kaimkaryam to Emperumaan Sriya: Pathi Sriman 
Narayanan.

5. Having surrendered to the Sriya: Pathi, we should develop an intense 
desire (tvarai) for the Paramapadha prApthi and utter Dwayam, (contemplating 
its esoteric deep meaning) at all times.

All above qualities are for us, Srivaishnavas, who have surrendered to 
Emperumaan Sriya: Pathi Sriman Narayanan.

If we attempt to inculcate and cultivate these guNAs, Sri AndAL and AchAtya 
saarva bhouman Swamy Desikan will be pleased.

Any mistake in the above writing is only mine; anything good is due to the 
great article written by the author.

Before winding up:

As Bhagyasaalis (fortunate ones) belonging to Sri Ramanuja dharsanam- our 
Srivaishnava Sampradayam, let us remind ourselves of:

Tatvam:

(1) Sentient soul- Jeevathman;
(2) achith – Insentient matter
(3) Iswaran- Emperumaan Sriya: Pathi Sriman Narayanan- sEshi (master- owner) 
for both Chit and Achit

Hitham- (means- way) the Lotus Feet of Emperumaan Sriya: Pathi Sriman 
Narayanan, through Bhakti yOgam or Prapatti (saraNAgathy)

AND

Purushaartham- Eternal ceaseless service at the Lotus Feet of Sriya: pathi 
Sriman Narayanan.

THIS IS OUR SRIVAISHNAVA SAMPRADAYAM.

Sri AndAL ThiruvadigaLE SaraNam
Swamy Desikan ThiruvadigaLE SaraNam
Regards
Narayana Narayana
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